The best drummer ever

Who’s better than these two? No one, that’s who!

Body Image

You know, for a long time now, women have been subject to impossible physical standards placed by magazines, tv, movies, models, and musicians. Men have definitelt been given the long end of the stick in that department….untl recently. Currently, there is s rise in standard in the male realm. We are now being given a image to become ad it is almost impossible without expendable wealth, personal trainers, style consultants, personal chefs, etc…
I am in no way saying that it is even. Women definitely take the brunt of the status, standard abuse. You must admit though, it is becoming harder and harder for men t look right, wear the right clothes, and so on. Currently, what was once considered feminine and gay is now almost required in order to even get the attention of a woman. When did being a man become so unattractve?
I, personally, don’t want to make the change. There is a difference between showering and knowing how to not look like you were attacked by a dog and popping your collar and getting your arms waxed. Women, I emplore you, don’t forget that there are me out there. We are strong, smart, sweet and good for you. Not wearing pink should never be a deal breaker.

Soup and a sandwhich

So, i just went shopping and it would appear that i have an incredibley boring diet. I eat soup and sandwhiches almost exclsively. My fridge and cabinets look like Ronald McDonalds closet.
Don’t get me wrong, i do like other things; sushi, mexican, a good burger. It’s just that i find that i am always in the mood for soup and a sandwhich. It’s like those movies you can always watch because they’re so comforting or human flesh to a cannibal. I mean, you ask a fat kid if he wants a candy bar at any time of day and he’ll probably say yes. Ask me what i’d like for dinner and i may not be sure what i’m in the mood for, but offer me tomato soup and turkey on wheat and i’m as content as a monkey flinging pooh.

Freedom Fries

So, I was thinking. If you are in the location whose name preceeds an item as it’s description, do you still use the the descriptive geographic word?

Translation: in sweden, are swedish fish just “fish”?
spain, is Spanish rice just “rice”?
ireland, is irish coffee just “coffee”?

France is like the motherload. French fries, bread, toast, kissing. Do you french kiss a girl in france or just kiss and when not using tongues…i don’t know…”American kiss”? We’re not even sure what the true origin of the “fry” is anyway, so why does france own it? Many say it was a belgium creation and it was actually a Belgian immigrant who brought fries to the english.
But, the english call french fries, chips, when they should be calling then “belgian fries”. What do they call potato chips in england, though, if chips is already taken?
my brain hurts. it’s all delicious so i guess i shouldn’t care.

Top 10 Worst date movies

10.  Audition-Widower takes an offer to screen girls at a special audition, arranged for him by a friend to find him a new wife. The one he fancies is not who she appears to be

9.  Blue Velvet-After finding a severed human ear in a field, a young man soon discovers a sinister underworld lying just beneath his idyllic suburban home town.

8.  Happiness-Three middle-class New Jersey sisters all have their problems with their families and sex lives.

7.  Battle Royale-In future Japan, the government capture a class of ninth-grade students and force them to kill each other under the revolutionary “Battle Royale” act.

6.  KIDS-An amoral, HIV-positive skateboarder sets out to deflower as many virgins as possible while a local girl who contracted his disease tries to save his next target from her same fate.

5.  A Clockwork Orange-In future Britain, charismatic delinquent Alex DeLarge is jailed and later volunteers for an experimental aversion therapy developed by the government in an effort to solve society’s crime problem… but not all goes to plan.

4.  Deliverence-Intent on seeing the Cahulawassee River before it’s turned into one huge lake, outdoor fanatic Lewis Medlock takes his friends on a river-rafting trip they’ll never forget into the dangerous American back-country.

3.  Requiem For A Dream-The hopes and dreams of four ambitious people are shattered when their drug addictions begin spiraling out of control.

2.  Man Bites Dog-A camera crew follows a serial killer/thief around as he exercises his craft.

1.  Schindler’s List-Oskar Schindler uses Jews to start a factory in Poland during the war. He witnesses the horrors endured by the Jews, and starts to save them.

Well, there’s my list.  Can you think of any other movies that would simply ruin your chances of a goodnight kiss?

Oh Yeah?

Remember when you were young and you and another hard headed classmate were fighting over something insane ridiculous? It was always a question to which both of you never really had an answer and yet, you fought as if you wouldn’t be able to procreate if proven wrong. “No! There is no way that peanut butter is as good as jelly! That is a fact!” Then, the culmination was always, ” Oh yeah? Well, my dad could beat up your dad!”

Discussion over. Wins every time.

You’d think that as we got older, we would learn to accept opinions, dmit when were wrong, or at least not resort to saying things like your a poopie head to end our dilemmas. Wouldnt you? Well, unfortunately, it has only gotten worse with us. Our opinions are facts that need not be resourced, and if they are resourced, it is only from one side and never taking into account the reality of circumstance, status or personal tastes.

Prince is the greatest musician of all time and I prove it by referring to his catalogue of music, dancing ability, fame, etc… But, what if someone just flat out doesn’t like him or can reference a period in which he fell off and stopped creating good music. As valid as their point and opinion may be, I could never look at those references. Plus, my dad can beat up your dad!

W.O.W.

I just watched the “make love not warcraft” episode of South Park, and of course, it was hilarious and brilliant as they always seem to be. It did, though, make me think of something somewhat interesiting.
I have never been a fan of baseball or football. I don’t really get offended or care if other people are, I just don’t get the fascination. Or, I didn’t until now. These are statistical games in which the fans knowledge of the prior 5 decades increases the actual enjoyment of the game. If you know that this batter normally and in the past has hit poorly against lefty hispanic pitchers with lazy eyes, it makes for an exciting moment in a game that is generally pretty slow. Even the announcers beat you about the face with a barrage of statistics to help you along in your mental enhancement of these otherwise somewhat tedious games.
Now is the part where everyone is going to get upset. This is the same thing as role playing. there is no difference between knowing that the Bills offense is no match for the Steelers “D” in snowy conditions during the fall and knowing that your mage can’t defeat a fire-dragon unless it uses a +5 Sword of Wisdom. IT’S THE SAME THING! The excitement is all in your head.
Let me just say, there is nothing wrong with this. It’s just not my overpriced cup of Fenway piss you call beer. What I will say is maybe all the jocks who decide it’s cool to beat the livng crap out of D&D nerds could think about how alike they are before the swirlies begin. I mean…i was always nice to those kids. Isn’t that the only true way to gain experience and level up?

HELLHOLE!

Have you seen “This is Spinal Tap”? If not, crawl out from under your proverbial rock and buy it. It will be one of the best purchases you ever make.

If you have seen it, then you must see “The Return of Spinal Tap”. It is not a sequel, but a concert with small updates of what the band has been up to since last seen. I is full of great music, hilarious lyrics, full versions of songs only partially heard in the movie, devilishly clever insights from the band and crew, and of course…STONEHENGE.

If ever a band went to 11 it is SPINAL TAP. Get all that you can.

awesome balls

From the deliciously funny minds of cast members of Reno 911 and MTV’s The State, comes this wonderfully silly comedy about professional and underground ping pong.  Do not enter this movie expecting anything more than you should.  It is stupid as hell and that is definitely on purpose.

Christopher Walken’s performance as Master Feng, holder of the final tournament, is flawless and hilarious as to be expected from him. This part must have been written with him in mind.  More noticable though, is newcomer and star of the film Dan Folger.  A strange blend of Jack Black and Sam Kinison, this actor is sure to be a star in the comedy realm; nailing both physical and comic timing with precision.

I  will say again, “THIS MOVIE IS STUPID”, but you will laugh your frickin butt off.

A boy and his toy

My new toy. A semi-hollow Schecter with a peizo pick up. Well worth the money and it plays like a dream. The stock tuners are grover and the neck is through. Can’t beat that.

I’ll eventually replace the pickups, but even the stock ones sound great.